Teletubbies: SPAWN OF SATAN!!! Author: Jerry Furball Date: 1999/02/11 Forum: alt.christnet.second-coming.real-soon-now more headers author posting history [post reply] [prev] [next] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Yes, Jerry Falwell once again reveals that he REALLY knows what's up in the world, and attacks the burning issues! In the name of Christ, who said "Judge lots, lest ye burn in the everlasting pits of Heck", The Right Reverend Falwell asserts the following evidence to back up his claim that Tinky Winky likes to plook members of his same sex: 1. Tinky Winky carries a purse (described by the evil makers of the series as a "magic bag, which brings in the ominous spectre of Magic and Witchcraft as well!!!). 2. Tinky Winky has a triangle on his/her head!!! 3. Tinky Winky is purple!!!!!! Since the Right Rev refuses to comment further than his one paragraph statement, I offer further evidence and other disturbing data on all the teletubbies. 1. The stiffy poking out of Dipsy's head should not give any doubt that he is a subtle reference to Slick Willie, and given that, the open orifice on Po's head should send chills down your back...imagine what might happen should your childrens' toy Dipsy phallus and Po hole come into contact, and what ideas might this may give them!!!! Truly SHOCKING!!!!!!!!! 2. While we're talking about head protruberances, let's address Laa-Laa's "thing". Well, it's twisted...yes, bent...Laa-Laa is obviously the gender bender of the group, and you don't want to see what pops out when she opens her video monitor!!! Righteous indignation fills my soul, My Christian brothers and sisters!!!! 3. They ALL sport colors that can be found in the rainbow, and we all know that the Rainbow Coalition is a bunch of faggy boys and girls and...well, anyway... 4. They all laugh and smile a bunch, which would make them...yep, GAY!!! 5. They also tend to hug a bunch, which we at the Jerry Falwell Deep Research Center have discovered that homosexuals do a lot (not by first-hand experience, of course). 6. They talk gibberish, which quite obviously identifies them as drug addicts. 7. Back to the "magic bag", its references to shamanism and magic are unmistakable... this show is obviously teaching our children to be sexually active bisexual Satanist drug addicts!!!! I'm really, really, indignant! 8. That evil face in the "sun" that shines down upon the decadant little bastards... clear evidence of OVERT IDOLATRY!!! EVIL EVIL EVIL!!! But this can be rectified. Let's just do what good Christians have done through the ages to those who question our beliefs. Kill them. In the name of God, of course, because he told me just today that it's ok, so go ahead, just off every teletubby you see, and make it messy so we can prove our point. Bless you all, and praise Jerry Falwell for once again showing the care, compassion and love for the fellow straight, white, heterosexual, tithe paying pinheads of our own fanatic sect and judgement for the rest of the targets, er, heretics. (PS, now on to the Falwell statement that the Antichrist is a male Jew, and probably a fag, too, by the way).