Panlucida The Hunt for Wyatt Ferguson Meet the Saucers Combine The Devil's War Superhuman World Superhuman World 2008
Me in the Superhuman World:
Startup Escalation 1999 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 .
This Year: Jan Feb Mar Apr May A Prequel Jun Devil's War Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec .

Superhuman World 2008 is a work of fiction. The characters herein and the commentary about them should not be considered "real".


The Devil's War


The Devil's War

If there's anything I respect about this Superhuman World, it's how not all the evil can be isolated to one place. For instance, there's at least one popular TV series where villains scheme to unleash a virus. But if they tried that here, other people would try something entirely different at the same time, like raising the Devil.

Here we have the story of Satanists who think Satan actually needs their help to take over the Earth. Let's find out what everyone else thinks about that.

(signed) Wyatt Ferguson.


What Now 2008? Commentator: Wyatt Ferguson.

I'm defending my Lansing house against a siege! They occasionally throw a gas grenade in through the bathroom window, but I grab one and throw it back out. One person with me accuses the police of bathing him in the blood of his son. (18 Jun)

  • There's still a bit of low-level urban rebellion in Lansing-Michigan, in which I played a part last year. That's one reason I'm getting out.
  • Another reason is, my Baptist friends came back from overseas! So, I don't have to cover for them any more.
    • Missionary work in the Third World can be overrated, especially when the common result when a dumbshit walks in front of your car, is a lynch mob. The pastor's wife is still having nightmares. So for them, South Lansing isn't all that scary any more.
    • As for me, I have another job...

A woman in my office believes in hex symbols, and she's recruited four men; they're blacked out in status reports. It's disruptive. (23 Jun)

  • I'm going to work alongside my lady patron (and she actually prefers this term to "matron"), the Countess Symmetria San Giacomo. She's chosen Oregon for her North American headquarters because she wants cheap technicians. Time was, you could go into McDonalds there and hire the fry cooks as software engineers. Nowadays I could recommend Michigan for that.
  • Symmetria (for personal reasons I don't call her "the Countess") believes in equal opportunity for all sexes, religions, and mystic belief systems - until they $#@! with her operations. This cabal gets expelled pretty damn fast.

In a store I see a Canadian invasion game. It just covers the border, and oddly not Ottawa. But it comes with a video of the North American power grid going down if Hydro Quebec blows up. (23 Jun)

  • The concept of ultimate national security is pretty powerful, and it's backed by the Patriotic Homeland Corps. Apparently the Corps backs Senator McCain for U.S. President. He doesn't like talking about the southern border, but there's still some talk about securing the northern one. Hence the game.
  • Other villains have other preferences. There's some evidence, most of the Secret Masters have groomed Senator Obama to be their blemish-free Disney-style frontman. But my own patron Symmetria went to great effort to push Senator Rodham-Clinton (for personal reasons I don't just call her "Clinton") through to be the "presumptive nominee".
  • Superhumans have changed this world's issues. Russians are an even bigger issue than Moslems right now, since they grabbed exclusive control of Earth orbit last year.
  • Womanhood is also a big issue, since all women got superhuman powers during the Panlucida Incident. But nobody wants to bring that issue up, any more than they want to mention age or skin color. The way they state their concern is: The spread of superhuman powers, by mystic means or otherwise, needs to be regulated.
  • The upcoming election is way up for grabs. All three factions seem equal, and Senator Obama says he might go back on an earlier "unity" promise and run as an independent! His supporters' unofficial "Bros Before Hos" motto didn't work for him in the early going, but there's still a lot of backlash support for a male "candidate of change". And he's apparently committed to doing whatever people will donate money for him to do.

I'm at an adult camp. It's like a soap opera, but I'm still friends with everyone so far. One woman snuggles with me, and her boyfriend shares his hymnal. (27 Jun)

  • Symmetria's organization has some strange allies, and some strange rallies. I'm pretty sure the Herodias Dancers' Guild is heavily involved.

A doctor's young assistant updates a spreadsheet of superhuman powers. When he hides some columns, it shows that the Beast is assuming control. (28 Jun)

  • Symmetria has lots of talented people who track the superhumans, including some medical doctors and their staffs.
  • Evidence is, most of the superhuman powers have decreased in the latest month. I know the Method Man can neutralize these powers, but even he can't account for it all.
  • Now, would this hypothetical Beast be the Alien Beast who works with the heroes? Maybe...

A woman goes berserk until I smack her across the face with a rod of ice. Afterward, she asks if I really want a relationship, and invites me down to see the state senate. (29 Jun)

  • Symmetria's research into the superhuman powers and the rise of the Beast has attracted the attention of Auge von Shaitan! His Devil's Eye peeks throughout the facility, until I notice it on Gillette's face and call the boss. I'm pretty high up in the organization, so my boss is Symmetria herself.
  • Then all hell breaks loose. It comes down to me vs. a possessed Symmetria in a banquet hall. Fortunately I have some experience in fighting superhuman females (as witness Patty Abdol). Fortunately also, Symmetria is both strong and strong-willed, so when I whack her across the Devil's Eye with part of an ice sculpture while uttering a Nordic oath I learned from Odin, she recovers.
  • Later, I'm walking with a cane. I have some arthritis, and combat with a superhuman is as least as debilitating as golfing. But Symmetria seems injured too.
    • She has a moment of vulnerability, and starts talking in terms of "relationship". She's stuck between the worlds of heroes and villains, just like me. Sometimes she's lonely.
    • But I am a pragmatic employee and do not take advantage... just yet. I don't have any ulterior motive I can think of, but it does pay to get along with the boss.
    • I do find out about her family history, though. Symmetria is the little sister of one "Dominatra", who used to pick fights with superhumans. She got killed by the Total Conversion team. Fortunately Symmetria is smart enough to not hold a grudge.
  • For her own part Symmetria may have decided, I am the sort of ally who needs some extra control. I know her to be a member of the Herodias Dancer's Guild, so I know she thinks that way. And I know her to have used her husband the Count San Giacomo as a stepping stone to power - and had him killed.
  • But right now, Symmetria and I work well together. And my ability to get out of romance and survive is damn near legendary, even among superhumans.
  • She's really rough as a lover, but she also consents to go on dates with me. Those who are in the know about our Superhuman World, know that it is a statement of alliance when we appear together at an Oregon state senate hearing.


The Devil's War. Commentator: Wyatt Ferguson.

June 2008     See Our Other Issues!
Is It a Sign of the Apocalypse?

The following photo was taken in South Lansing, Michigan. The cloud formation is centered over a Baptist church which was involved in the Secret Wings controversy. (See Related Story)

Religious authorities deny any significance, but the faithful of various religions are considering it to be a sign.

The Fist of God

Satanists are starting to become annoying. At last we know why the angels are hanging around. Hmmm, should I mention how the Fist of God was seen in the sky over my old Baptist church in Lansing? (2 Jul)

The fabled Beast of the Apocalypse is tracking California school districts where he's welcome as the leadership changes. He's moving north. (7 Jul)

  • Satanists are offended that the Black Arts Competition of 2007 culminated in an invocation of the Christian Holy Mother. So they're having a counter-ceremony! For their venue they've picked San Francisco, which fits their idea of "evil city".
  • Their membership is practically every kind of normal person one might consider evil. They include an Internet bully (and rival mage of mine), a middle manager who leads by tantrum, a town policeman who indulges his fits of road rage, a real estate speculator who can't be bothered with code compliance for his rental properties, a PTA mom who puts fertility above everything else, and a homeless woman who gets her Satanic power from abusing the kindness of Christians.
  • The power of these particular schemers is at best second-tier. Traditionally in my Superhuman World(s), Satanists and other evil mages are just tools. For that reason, I decline to mention them by name. Names give power.
  • Their sponsorship is minimal. The Earthly Masters of Evil have their own plans. Even Auge von Shaitan is mostly interested in forestalling all those other people who might manifest the Devil's body parts. But the Strategos of the former secret Lunar colony seems to be backing them. And he's got lots of mechanical Volga Boatmen robots.
  • According to scholars of Apocalypse literature, there are actually two Apocalypse Beasts. One has ten heads and seven horns; this one is usually considered to be either a dynasty or a committee. These Satanists qualify for the latter role.
  • Li'l Beast of Satan
  • The second Beast is the first one's minion. For the role of First Beast, the PTA mom volunteered her two-year-old child. As every mother knows, two years old is the perfect age to be filled with the Devil. And to back her bid for Luciferpower, she has support for her "Every Child Nurtured" self-esteem initiative throughout the hippie parts of Northern California.
  • So, the kid's undergone the "Risen One" ceremony - in which he gets lots of Satan body parts, and enough Devil armor to look maybe eight years old. This is the same ceremony that my friend Karla Melhor was unwillingly subjected to, a couple of years ago. It works better with a willing recipient - or at least one that doesn't care.

I'm going out on bicycle to fight invaders. People from work and church are with me, but the latter are mostly dead. I'd better use my do-over. (11 Jul)

  • There's a march of robots or something, up the side of Interstate 5. Police have come to question the leader, but when they tell him to leave the road, he just plows through the woods.
  • Oregon is the logical next target when the Beast is moving north from California. It is just coincidence I'm there. But some of my friends from Lansing came out to see me, after they saw the Fist of God in the sky!
  • The point of the march seems to be mystic power, because nobody can seriously expect to conquer Oregon with however many marchers. On that basis, I propose to my boss we oppose it in mystic manner. She agrees.
  • My allies are my various church friends including people from Michigan, plus the sort of people from work who like to march to cure breast cancer, plus a bartender friend of mine from Michigan who's Buddhist but loves the angels and thinks a protest march against Satanists would be fun... Whatever. If you hate evil and imperfection, you get to help fight the Devil's brat.
  • Most of the invaders are mechanical Volga Boatmen from the Moon. It says something about me that I actually recognize them. They're not responding to opponents in flanking positions the way they usually do, though. And they're not playing; they're ripping people limb from limb if the people are in their path.
  • Okay, it's Make It Never Was time. I have that power on rare occasions, and this is one of them. On the do-over, we leave an observer moving alongside the robots. Then we get behind them, and start marching the other direction.
  • Later we learn, that subtracts enough from their mystic power that the National Guard can stop them at a roadblock. Or so we can claim. At any rate, their leader was complaining about how his toys couldn't make things go Boom so well.
  • Then the robots mysteriously deactivated! Their leader promptly stomped his feet, said something indistinct and probably Satanic, then sank through a hole of flame.

After it's over... I wake up early and have a mixed drink as a hotel cleans up from a convention.

  • I still live in hotel, because I just now moved to my current job.
  • I don't actually sleep with my boss even though we're close, so I still have my own bedroom.
  • Of course I know my bartenders, so they try out drink mixes on me.

Then a boy arrives in a cardboard time box which I helped pull him into. (15 Jul)

  • Hey, I recognize this kid - from Earth 2022. That death-stricken world is the second thing I made Never Was. I knew it had to be Never Was, because I went there.
  • But the kid got out first. Dammit, if I'd known he wasn't just pretending to ride a time machine when we were playing live-action Teenagers from Outer Space, I could have come along.
  • He's saying, 2008 is decisive - and it's not over yet. Oh joy.
  • And he's right. This invasion isn't even over! But I can at least tell him the story.
  • Now that I mention it, I remember him telling me that same story back in 2022. I being from 2002 at the time, it seemed like he was just inventing a rippin' good story about me. So I ignored it until now.
  • What does it mean, that this boy's past has changed several times, but his future is still Earth's future? This doesn't sound good for Earth.
  • And what does it mean that Earthling time-travellers like the son of Megaphone are still coming from the far future, beyond the end of the Earth? Well, that one I can answer. Aliens have been swiping Earthlings for millennia now, to put in "nature preserves".
  • Speaking of aliens...

An alien conqueror has taken a hostage. He's a former sponsor of Wendie Robinson the Galactic Librarian. Her many superhuman friends won't be pleased. (22 Jul)

  • The Satanists had an off-Earth sponsor who provided the robots for their ceremonial march. And here he is in Portland!
  • He's a big lizard, so I know him to be an alien Gronite. I remember him as the Teknokrat! He used to sponsor the human enclave of the secret Lunar colony. The Strategos was sort of his regent.
  • After I (of all people, but with a lot of help) defeated the Strategos in 1995 or thereabouts, the Teknokrat is sworn not to attack here again. And he's not so stupid as to pick a fight with the Combine or any other faction of Earthly superhumans, especially with his homeworld government watching.
  • His hostage is mostly for Galactic reasons; he says that's standard procedure to start a negotiation. Yeah, right. But on to the negotiation...
  • The Teknokrat just wants his robots back. He says he's done with humans using them. And he's the one who deactivated the robots. A human he knows as The Walker suggested he come check up on them. Hmmm, I suspect the hand of the Method Man.
  • After a bit of heavy superhuman patrolling, and a lot of arguing over whether the whole Lunar colony counts as swiped alien tech too, the exchange goes peacefully.
  • We keep the downed Lunar colony because the U.S. Air Force has it now, and it's useless anyway. The Teknokrat takes the robots because they're useless, and they're not all that special anyway. Heid-Ketzel robots are actually more impressive, because they were independently built on the same principle, and they were fine-tuned to our own planet. Theodore Ketzel invented these, and he already works for the Combine.
  • Well, that explains how the Secret Masters of Evil wasted their downed Lunar robots on those silly Satanists. The robots' real owner was coming back for them anyway.

The Powernaut and I patrol a bridge and pick up a headset. But it's in a bag - and broken. I'd have to say, the Secret Masters got to it first. (23 Jul)

  • My colleague Gillette Harris would usually take these field missions; he's young and eager. But he's going to community college now, to improve his language skills. And, having some wrestling experience courtesy of Hercules, he's now helping coach their women's wrestling program! Now that women are stronger than men, the lady wrestlers are the best. Our boss likes this, so she gives Gillette the night off, and I cover.
  • The city of Portland is kind of nervous about having superhumans prowl their city in the aftermath of an alien battle incident. Eventually they agree to have a certified local salvage team (namely, me and my cow-orkers) look for alien debris. The world's most popular superhuman (namely, the Powernaut) is allowed to escort us.
  • In my old world, the Mighty Tim was a United Nations spokesperson and was most popular. In this world, the Powernaut got here first. And he wasn't part of that old-world superhuman clique, which our new world is finding increasingly suspicious. Plus, he and his Power Patrol have a publicity agent.
  • The other superhumans have a response plan, though... They're having town meetings!


The Devil's War 2. Commentator: Wyatt Ferguson.

Crusher Joe Corrigan is touring the nation with various members of the Combine. For no particular reason, his first stop is Oklahoma City. During their visit, a tornado comes.

  • Tornados are not strange in Oklahoma, but this one's different. For one thing, there's a storm with it, but the tornado's out in front. For another, a babyfaced kid in Devil armor says he's been guiding it east from the state line, to avoid damage until now. But now that he can hit his enemies, anything goes. (25 Jul)
  • The Devil's Brat (my term caught on!) has improved his human language skills and made it here from Oregon, looking for revenge against whatever. He promises to level wherever the superhumans hide within the city. They must be the ones who defeated him, after all... Sometimes it's good to not take the credit, even though I helped defeat him and superhumans didn't.
  • The Combine sends reinforcements; their hero Mighty Tim can teleport them in. Their leader Ingrid Bodil comes in to command. She's as superpowered as any woman nowadays, but her main power is the ability to (for instance) tell Ellipsis to not go out to blow up the tornado himself.
  • Most of the Combine help get people to safety and prevent damage. Ellipsis, Morningstar Julie, the Mighty Tim, Wendie Robinson, Little Bill, and Senhora Valkyrie all have useful powers for that. Crusher Joe doesn't. But it's also useful just to have calm personnel on hand - though Oklahoma City is calmer than most cities when the tornado comes. Still, Dom-Ra the Solarian bashes the tornado easily. He's actually experienced in weather control.
  • All the Devil's Brat can think of, is to start insulting their mothers. At this point, the Alien Beast feels it appropriate to intervene. He has some induced powers himself, and it gives him mental strain to be accused of being the Earthly Beast of the Apocalypse. Which is to say, he's tired of it.
  • So the Alien Beast gives the Devil's Brat a ritual spanking, and then lets him go. Mages are monitoring; they assure the vengeful heroes, this is much more decisive a defeat than sending the kid's dead spirit to Hell would be.
  • The restrained response of the superhumans, and their following a "normal" human's leadership, buys them some points. (Sorry I called you "normal", Ingrid.)

It's pretty obvious now, this wasn't the real Apocalypse. I know this because, for one reason, the Warrior Ashanti from the Combine didn't get to wield the Anokye Sword like he always wanted to.

It would seem, the Prince of Darkness and his high-ranking minions were just using their low-ranking minions in a practice run. Here insert your own comment about how stupid it is to be a willing tool of Satan.

Me in the Superhuman World:
Startup Escalation 1999 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 .
This Year: Jan Feb Mar Apr May A Prequel Jun Devil's War Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec .

Crusher Joe is a character created by Joe Fucile. Little Billy (and Big Bob) is a character created by Vaughn Gross. All other characters in this fiction and the phrase "Superhuman World 2008" are copyright © 2008 by Eiler Technical Enterprises. The map of the Superhuman World is based on one from Henry Bottomley's map software which is well worth a visit.