Travelog of Upper Peninsula Michigan, 2008

Woke up at 6 am after a sound night of sleep. Departure from temporary EilerBase unusually early - 8:30 am.

Most tourists come into the Upper Peninsula from the east, via the Mackinac Bridge. This time the Domination of Eiler dares flank its opposition, swoop in from the west, and conquer the deep parts first - just like the cold front did yesterday. There is every reason to believe today will be the height of vacation.

• In Negaunee, the Michigan Iron Mining Museum submitted exhibits on the thing the Upper Peninsula contributed to the World Wars. 90% of American iron came from there in WW2, by their claim. Short hiking trails on site; a new hiking stick was conquered.
• U.S. Highway 41 is quite congested, but the mining museum is down a pleasant side road which goes all the way to the beach, albeit back across 41 and past Northern Michigan University. Overcame local opposition and thereby approached downtown Marquette via lakefront road from the north.
• The Dominator's beer sense led him with record-setting accuracy to the Vierling Restaurant / Marquette Harbor Brewery. Imperial pints of beer including Blueberry Wheat and some chicken salad were conquered.
• The Marquette Historical Museum is conveniently two blocks away for post-lunch rest stop. Main two exhibits are on Yooper culture. Rocks for sale in the gift shop.
• The Marquette Maritime Museum is also nearby on the waterfront. U.S. Coast Guard reluctantly allows museum visitors to be escorted into the Marquette lighthouse (tower off limits), but the tour gets down to the laundry room in the basement. Otherwise, the museum is mostly about shipwrecks.

Staying in Marquette near the attractions is pricey: $120 USD or so, even off season. Tourist hotels cluster on the way out of town (or into town for westbound visitors). So at 4 pm stopped by the Goodbye Center (or Welcome Center westbound) to get info on eastbound lodgings. Either of two towns may serve:

• Munising (30 miles from Marquette) has typical small-town amenities, plus lake cruises to go see the shipwrecks.
• Grand Marais (50 miles beyond Munising) is down a side road and even smaller (much like Cocodrie-Louisiana), but has a brewpub! Therefore selected per original plan.
• Traffic is a minimal factor, even on these two-lane roads. Logging trucks exist but are westbound toward Wisconsin, and most other traffic likes to go 75 mph. Therefore made 80 miles in 90 minutes, including a worthwhile stop to ask a park ranger for directions so as to not get trapped by a road closure on the short cut.
• Barracks at North Shore Lodge, a motel room which would overlook Lake Superior if the dunes weren't in the way, and half the price of downtown Marquette. Dinner (broiled whitefish and cherry ale) at Lake Superior Brewing Company per the plan. Bike ride in between (at last).

Actual infamous Great Lakes artifact. See also: The Nearest Lightouse The Nearest Pointy Bit of Shore

Where the Iroquois once invaded Michigan, here's another lighthouse.

The Soo Locks are overkill for some boats. See also: The Soo Bridge

Cocodrie-Louisiana is sending Michigan its weather. In advance of the rain front, the Domination of Eiler goes forth.

Only two targets are planned for today, both at Whitefish Point... but many others have come in view. Rebellion is widespread among these, but that in turn leads to even more Domination.

1. Muesems of Grand Marais: Rebellious. Old Post Office museum under construction, open 2009. Two other museums open weekends-only after Labor Day.
2. Lake Superior State Forest: Honored ally. Submitted a scenic drive east from Grand Marais, plus a chance to sit on the beach and carve the new stick. Drive was on dirt roads, of about backwoods Massachusetts quality - but that's fine for the Automobile of Dominance.
3. Great Lakes Shipwreck Museum, Whitefish Point: Ally. Submitted a historical village including lighthouse (tower off limits), beach, and many artifacts including the actual sunken bell from the Edmund Fitzgerald. But more was expected.
   • Lodging is available on site, in the Coast Guard's old lifeguard house. But bring a friend to share the room, because it costs $300 USD. They call it "$150 Double Occupancy" to make it sound better.
   • Food is available on site, but it's snack bar pasties and gift shop fudge. Don't even think about beer, or any kind of food after visitor's hours - unless you bring your own, in which case, why pay $300 a room?
   • Sound system in museum building frequently plays that famous Gordon Lightfoot song about the Edmund Fitzgerald. Remarked to admissions clerk that song was getting tiresome. She said, "Tell me about it."
4. Town of Paradise: Rebellious. It is nearest Whitefish Point, and might well be expected to take up its tourist load. It does have a selection of hotels, but just one cheap bar where the best draft beer is Budweiser. Occupation was therefore deemed irrelevant.
5. Tahquamenon (or whatever) Falls Restaurant and Brewery: Rebellious. Prime target for today, but evaded the Dominator's formidable beer-sense by operating out of a state park and not putting up directional signs! Gee, hope that business plan works out for them - if they're still in business.
6. Point Iroquois Light Station: Honored ally. Submitted two rooms of exhibits plus a boardwalk, and you can actually climb their lighthouse tower. (History lesson: The Iroquois never lived here, but they did unsuccessfully invade in the 1600s!) Light rain by now, but Domination gear good enough for an outdoor walk.
7. Bay Mills Casino and Resort, Brimley: Rebellious. No draft beer in hotel bar. Therefore chose not to expose car overnight where frustrated gamblers might break in. Also kept the new Iroquois flag out of sight, in case the Ojibway Nation which operates the casino is vengeful for that past invasion.
8. Ramada Plaza Hotel Ojibway, Sault Sainte-Marie: Ally. Submitted a room with nice amenities including HDTV, but at cost like unto downtown Marquette. But by then the Domination force had fought road construction and gone without lunch or nap, so met the Ramada's terms and tolerated much haggling for a quiet non-smoking room.
9. Moriarty's Alley Irish Pub, Sault Ste. Marie: Rebellious ally. This same pub submitted ten years ago, and they gave a good steak dinner tonight, but they also let a whiny infant into the bar side. Aren't there laws against child endangerment or something? But other bars in town were even worse, either smoky or creepy or not serving good draft.
10. Soo Locks Visitor Center, Sault Ste. Marie: Honored ally. Submitted a rest stop, plus a boat transit. Ten years ago the Dominator was accidentally on hand to watch the Great Lakes' largest freighter (the Paul R. Tregutha, according to the Visitor Center) barely fit through. But the Soo Locks tour boat fits just fine. The lock operator is happy to talk to tourists, even though it's raining. The guy inside the Visitor Center is actually paid to keep it open 9 am - 9 pm!
11. Captain's Pub and Grill, Sault Ste. Marie: Honored ally. The hotel bar has Killians on tap, and access to the nice desserts from the hotel restaurant. Good enough.

The expeditionary force has drawn its new Frontline along the Superior shore, and linked it back to the Domination of Eiler. But useful targets remain within. They will submit tomorrow.

Gaylord-Michigan has so much Swiss pride, it shows on their water tower.

At least when this museum sells rocks, they tell a story.

In the ten years since the tip of the Upper Peninsula submitted to the Domination of Eiler, the cities of Sault Sainte-Marie and Saint Ignace may have added a new museum or two. But these are not places that the Domination needs to risk conquering more than once.

Instead, caught up with phone messages and e-mail (no service since Green Bay), then pressed south. Stopped to ensure that nothing had been left unconquered in West Mackinaw City. Needn't have bothered.

Expeditionary force is now less than three hours from the District of Dominance, Lansing-Michigan. But targets yet remain, possibly worth spending another night.

• Higgins Lake State Park has a Civilian Conservation Corps Museum... closed Labor Day through Memorial Day, which the park ranger neglected to mention when selling the $8 day pass. Oh well, got some hiking in.
• During hike, a crown wobbled off one of the Dominator's teeth. Tried to glue it back on with portable repair kit, to no avail. Not the best of mornings. But nothing to cancel vacation over, since dentists won't care until Monday anyway.
• City of Houghton Lake is capable of providing food and pond-front lodging... with a sort of cheap Rhode Island beachfront ambiance. Having just conquered the real thing at Lake Superior, the Domination moved on.
• City of Mount Pleasant has a casino, a university whose team is safely down in Georgia today, and the Mountain Town Station Brewery and Steakhouse. This doesn't show up on brewpub lists because their descendant company the Mount Pleasant Brewing Company grew into its own brewery. Still worth occupying for lunch, though. The Dominator managed to gum down some chicken ravioli, with the help of pints of raspberry wheat beer.
• The Central Michigan University has a Museum of Cultural and Natural History which is worth seeing for free. It has big rocks, interesting squid models, and one panel which probably tells the CCC's story as well as the CCC Museum could have.

That's about it. All today's places are survivable and may be worth reoccupation in future. But the Dominator's own bed is about an hour away now, and it's sounding attractive.

The Domination will admit to these operational shortcomings, though:

Still the Domination of Eiler forces return triumphant as ever, all praise to the One Maker.

(signed) Dominator S. Eiler, Fist of the One Maker, for the Domination of Eiler.